Best grammer ever for a translator.

[TRDon]

I hate these in the clubhouse so I am gonna put it here, I coulndt stop laughing at this one

Good evening,

I got your contact and would like to share a very important business and I apologise much for the inconvenience.

I am Mr. Issam Majeed, I am working with Iraq Military Americans as a translator. I have proof for you According to demonstrate. In one of our military operations in Iraq, we discovered Safe in a large house of a great businessman Iraqi in the town of TIKRIT. The safe contains a large Sum of money, US $ 20 Million American dollars.

We immediately kept this safe in a secure place With three other American soldiers. After lengthy deliberations Among ourselves as to whether we need to recover these funds American authorities in charge of place or not, we all decided To share these funds between us. For sharing, each of us Received the sum of US $ 5 Million for my part because of security problems in Iraq, I decided for me with private security officers to Iraq to Transfer my share of these funds outside Iraq, specifically in London.

I put the money in a package as family affairs And I coded which means that nobody knows that Package contains money except me. What I tell you is the truth and if we treat all In this case, you will see. So I contact to see if you can help me a retrieves the Packages in London and transfer it to your country, or I would Invest these funds
in areas profitable. I give you Also some percentages of such funds for accepting to help me, the percentage we will discuss it when I receive your Answer.

The insurgents are Iraqis against me and therefore I looking to kill me because I do translations American military. I do not go out without any comment Military Americans to avoid the worst. I do not use Phones or not getting calls here. I just The Internet and walking-talking to communicate with military I work with.

If the transaction is concluded, I want to resign from the Work because to live here in Iraq is too risky.

Thank you and I wait for your answer.
Mr. Issam Majeed.

[ejholmgren]

I still don't understand why they always randomly capitalize words.

[sport the war]

I still don't understand why they always randomly capitalize words.

You'RE n0t a 1337 hax0r

[ejholmgren]

So, yesterday i Went to the Store. The man at the Counter said I was Twenty cents Short.

Lesson #1: Went, Store, Counter, Twenty, and Short are all proper nouns.t

[RegalX]

WTF, I just read it outloud to myself and had to stop about 20 times and re read shit

one of the better parts......

"So I contact to see if you can help me a retrieves the Packages in London and transfer it to your country, or I would Invest these funds
in areas profitable."

[Colin]

So, yesterday i Went to the Store. The man at the Counter said I was Twenty cents Short.

Lesson #1: Went, Store, Counter, Twenty, and Short are all proper nouns.t

Nah. Went is a verb ("to go") in the past tense. I think short is a predicate when it's used like that.

[Max Power]

"Best grammer ever for a translator."

Grammer?

[sport the war]

"Best grammer ever for a translator."

Grammer?

Grammah waves.

[Odrapnew]

I translated it for you guys. Makes much more sense this way.

I hizzle these in tha clubhizouse so I am gonna put it here, I coulndt stop spendin' at this one

Good even'n,

I gots yo contact n would like ta share a very important business n I apologise M-to-tha-izzuch fo` tha inconvenience.

I am Mr. Issam Majeed, I am work'n wit Iraq Military Americans as a translator. I have proof fo` you Saggin' ta demonstrate fo' sheezy. In one of our military operations in Iraq, we discovered Safe in a large hizouse of a bootylicious businizzles Iraqi in tha ghetto of TIKRIT so sit back relax new jacks get smacked. The safe contains a large Sum of money, US $ 20 Million American dollars . Real *****s recognize the realness..

We immediately kizzept this safe in a secure place Wit three ***** American soldia. Gangsta lengthy deliberizzles Among ourselves as ta whetha we need ta recova these funds American authorities in charge of place or N-to-tha-izzot, we all decided To share these funds between us. For shar'n, each of us Received tha sum of US $ 5 Million fo` mah P-to-tha-izzart coz of security problems in Iraq, I decided fo` me wit private security playa ta Iraq ta Bitch mah share of these funds outside Iraq, specifically in London.

I put tha money in a package as family affairs And I coded whizzich means that nobody knows thiznat Package contains money except me. W-H-to-tha-izzat I T-to-tha-izzell you is tha truth n if we treat all In this case, you wizzle see. So I contact ta see if you can hizzle me a retrieves tha Packages in London n transfa it ta yo country, or I would Invest these funds
in areas profitable. I give you Also some percentizzles of siznuch funds fo` spendin' ta help me, tha percentage we wizzle discuss it whizzen I receive yo Answa.

The insurgents is Iraqis against me n therefore I ballin' ta kizzay me coz I do translations American military . Snoop heffner mixed with a little bit of doggy flint. I do not go out witout any comment Military Americans ta avoid tha worst with my hoes on my side, and my strap on my back. I do not use Phones or not gett'n calls hizzle , ya feel me?. I jizzay The Internet n walk'n-talk'n ta communicate wit military I work wit.

If tha transaction is concluded, I wizzle ta resign from tha W-to-tha-izzork coz ta live here in Iraq is too risky ta help you tap dat ass.

Thank you n I wait fo` yo killa.
Mr. Issam Majeed.