Sick, but funny

[Fernanernie]

WW FOR WRITTEN LANGUAGE.

http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/9wcte/reddit_whats_the_grossestnastiest_thing_thats/

Some great laughs, and

[kineda]

NEW ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED

[xjfish]

I accidentally shit once while fucking a girl.

I was pretty drunk and had to fart.

I had the runs, and well. You know... I pooped. It was especially runny, it felt weird landing on the back of my thighs. It really sucked, but I kept on at it for a few more minutes.. Then I felt the bubble guts. I was torn. I was drunk, so I was debating if I wanted to just shit and keep going or get up and run away. Some how those were my only two options.

My body had a third option.

I decided to get up and just leave but I didn't want get my pants all covered in shit.

So I did a quick wipe with the boxers, threw my jeans on.. and pretty much just walked out.

I was really upset at myself for how I handled it.

I started to walk home and I fell down and shit myself.

I think it could have been karma.

.

[kineda]

Did you high-five the tapeworm?

[Fernanernie]

Did you high-five the tapeworm?

'Tapworm'

I lost it there.

[Scotty07]

I see the trailer park crew found a place to post their conquests!

[289Notch]

that shit turned me off for the evening I think.

[RNSF]

Slightly less enthused but still determined I plunged in face-first and started getting busy. The taste of this beaver, if possible, was worse than it looked. It was fetid and bitter and to make matters worse I had numerous pubic hairs caught in my throat which were tickling me and making me cough.

OMG :idiot:

[fuzzy moonunit]

Goddammit. If you link to reddit where am I going to go to get away from TCS?

[kineda]

So this one time I'm having sex with my girlfriend right, and it was all good and sexy so we finish up and everything seems cool.

Then about 9 months later a fucking little human being comes out of her pussy! I mean just like pops out and I saw that shit with my own eyes!

The little fucker is still living with us.

[Paul Revere]

Ex girlfriend and me having anal sex in a pitch black room. Smell hits, I turn on the lights, and there is dark brown diarrhea all over my crotch, and both our legs.

Cleaning up in the shower afterwards with her I said with a smile, "That was pretty gross."

She says, "I thought it was pussy juice, so I was rubbing it into my pussy."

I have of late, and wherefore I know not, lost all my mirth.

[Fernanernie]

Goddammit. If you link to reddit where am I going to go to get away from TCS?

YouPorn?

[kineda]

Goddammit. If you link to reddit where am I going to go to get away from TCS?

gaychubbydating.com?

[specialk922]

...this girl I've known for a long time came over to my apt, so we have some drinks start fooling around, I get her into my bed, take her pants off and, BAM, he vagina smells like a garbage truck...

I spit water on my computer when I read that one. I don't know why it's so funny, but I'm going to giggle whenever I see a garbage truck now.

[Fernanernie]